A voice from the past

I’m not exactly sure why, but yesterday I decided to scroll through some old texts between me and Brian. I happened upon a short video he had sent me last April and clicked it on.

It was a 12 second clip of our cat Tweety. Brian’s hand was visible in the video brushing her as he sang “cat dad” to the tune of the theme song to Batman. It was about six weeks or so after we had gotten the cat, and she was beginning to get a little more friendly as she adjusted to her new home.

I played the clip over, and over, and over. I have a video of Brian singing karaoke, but I didn’t think I had any recording of his speaking voice. I hadn’t thought I would ever hear his voice again after he died last August.

The recording gave me comfort, and I cried tears that were a mix of emotions. The sadness that stabbed my heart after Brian died was sharpened a bit, but the feeling was overridden by a wave of joy from finding a treasure. I felt like I had just been awarded something precious. 

I immediately did a Google search of recordable mementos and found someone on Etsy who sells  heart-shaped sound recorders with heart-shaped wood memorial boxes to store them in. I ordered one so I will have a place to keep this special audio memory.

A friend told me that this was an early Valentine’s gift. If it was, it’s the best present I could have gotten. If you gave me a choice of the recording of Brian’s voice or a large sum of money, I’d take the recording. You can’t put a price on memories, whether they are recorded, written down, or tucked away in your heart.

Liz Gotthelf is the publisher of Saco Bay News. She is stumbling through life after the recent and unexpected loss of her husband, and will periodically write columns about it as she processes everything. She can be reached at newsdesk@sacobaynews.com.